I’d like to introduce you to a friend of mine.
Okay, well, I wouldn’t necessarily call him a FRIEND, per se. He can certainly ACT like a friend when he wants to. But he’s more of a fair-weather friend (which in my book, is not really a friend at all).
Okay, I’d like to introduce you to somebody I know. His name is Big Mo.
Big Mo has always been in my life in one way or another, but I never really had a name for him. That is, until I started watching Georgia games with Brad and his dad. That’s when Big Mo and I first officially met.
If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you know the rabidity of the level of dedication to Georgia football in the Staton family. I’ve been around it for several years now and I still don’t get it.
But I get that I don’t get it and that doesn’t mean it’s not real or legitimate. It just is what it is. I knew (to some extent) what I was signing up for when I let Brad Staton put a ring on it. Saturdays from August to January are hereby henceforth and forever spoken for. So let it be written. So let it be done.
Now I was born and raised a Gator and I will always be a Gator. But that doesn’t mean I can’t love my husband by enjoying what’s important to him. (But when Georgia plays Florida, I’m out. I cannot cheer against my team.)
So I was watching a game with Brad and his dad and showing the proper amount of enthusiasm, when I heard Tommy happily say after a run of particularly good plays, “Looks like Big Mo just put on a red jersey!”
I knew how to do the GOOOOOO, DAWGS! SIC ‘EM! WOOF, WOOF, WOOF, WOOF! before and during each kick off. I knew to hold up four fingers at the beginning of the fourth quarter. I had grasped the concept of HUNKER DOWN, DAWGS! But this was a new one.
At the risk of asking a question during the game (and not waiting for a commercial), I leaned over to Brad and whispered, “Big Mo?”
He never took his eyes off the TV. “Momentum,” he answered quickly.
I smiled. “Got it.” And I did.
I chuckled and thought to myself, Big Mo, you S.O.B. You’ve been pulling the strings of my life for 37 years, haven’t you?
Now, don’t get me wrong. God is huge. God is sovereign. He’s got the whole world in His hands. And there is no other force or energy, good or evil that can even come close to the power of the Creator of the Universe.
And yet, I have to admit, momentum often plays a bigger role than I realize.
Newton’s first law of motion is, “When viewed in an inertial reference frame, an object either remains at rest or continues to move at a constant velocity, unless acted upon by a net force.” An object that is at rest will stay at rest unless a force acts upon it. An object that is in motion will not change its velocity unless a force acts upon it.
Basically, if something is left alone, it will continue doing what it is or isn’t doing. If it’s still, it will stay still until something makes it move. If it’s moving, it will keep moving, until something stops it. Makes sense.
Big Mo has made his appearance in my life on many occasions, usually under the guise of I’m on a roll! And we all know from when we’ve tried to make changes in our lives that getting started is the hardest part. And after that, well, we tend to stay in motion.
Starting a new workout routine, making a point to make healthy food choices, creating a habit of Bible study and prayer, scheduling weekly dates with your spouse, beginning the process of getting out of debt. All of those require a ‘force to act upon’ us to get us moving. And the good news is, once we’re moving, we’re likely to keep moving.
I see momentum at work in my coaching clients’ journeys as well. I can usually tell after our first complimentary phone session when Big Mo will show up and how long he’ll stick around.
Unfortunately, as I mentioned before, momentum only lasts so long and can only get you so far. At some point, you stumble. And instead of picking you up, dusting you off and getting you back on track, Big Mo switches teams. And that’s where people get stuck and/or give up. An object at rest will stay at rest.
Cue the force to act upon you.
You know what the force is? (Not, THE Force, fellow Star Wars nerds. Calm down.)
Your WHY.
Viktor Frankl said, “Those who have a WHY to live, can bear with almost any HOW.”
Quick bio of Viktor Frankl: He was a Jewish psychologist in Austria during the Nazi takeover. He practiced as long as he was allowed to (mainly in the area of suicide prevention) before he, his wife, his parents and his siblings were deported to a Nazi Ghetto in 1942.
While living there, he organized a service unit for new arrivals to adapt and work through their shock and grief and set up an official suicide watch.
In 1944, he and his whole family were taken to Auschwitz concentration camp. His parents, his brother and wife all died there. He and his sister were the only survivors in his family.
He later used those experiences to write a book called Man’s Search for Meaning. (Also titled Saying Yes to Life in Spite of Everything: A Psychologist Experiences the Concentration Camp. Haven’t read it yet. It’s on the list.)
Frankl was a contemporary of (and studied with) Sigmund Freud. Freud’s whole philosophy was that people lived in constant pursuit of pleasure.
Frankl disagreed. He believed that people lived in a constant pursuit of PURPOSE, and if they could not find it, would settle for pleasure.
Frankl knew his WHY and in his opinion, that’s why he could ‘bear any HOW.’ And he did. He bore the most horrific of HOWs. And survived.
Because of his WHY.
There’s a process I learned in my coaching training of helping people discover their goals and/or purpose. It’s a five-step process and my favorite step is #3: Remember Why.
Between the setting of goals and the going after of said goals is this interesting third step. The idea is to take a significant pause between the plan and the process to lock in on the client’s WHY. Because at some point, Big Mo is going to bail. And that WHY, that ‘force to act upon’ will be the key to overcoming obstacles on the journey. It’s powerful.
Why are we doing this? Why is it important to accomplish this goal
Because I want to be healthy, have more energy and be able to enjoy my life.
Because I want to finally be in control of my finances, instead of feeling like they’re in control of me.
Because I want to have more time to spend with people I love.
Because I’ve got one shot at this life and I want to make sure I don’t miss my calling.
Because I want to set a good example and create a legacy for my kids.
Because I want to be free of this hurt from my past that has been causing me pain for so long.
Because I want my wife to know that our marriage IS a priority to me, that I see her and appreciate her.
Because I feel like this is something I was created to do and I can’t NOT do it.
So we get the WHY established and set off on the course we’ve charted to the end goal. Big Mo will make an appearance or two, sometimes brief, sometimes extended. But when the speed bump is hit, we go back to the WHY and we keep moving.
I love riding the wave of momentum. It’s such a high. I feel indestructible. Unstoppable. And just because it can’t carry you all the way to the finish line doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take advantage of it when you get the opportunity.
Purpose. Meaning. Goals. Calling. WHY.
These are big concepts to wrestle with. And Satan often uses the busyness of life to keep us from ever thinking about such things. If he had his way, we’d spend our lives in the daily grind and get to the end of our lives with nothing to show but a bank account.
God has created each of us with a unique purpose. And I regularly tell dear friends that I pray He would not leave them alone, that He would drive them CRAZY until they figure out what it is and start chasing it with all their heart.
And when Big Mo shows up as a running buddy, high five him, feed off his energy and enjoy his company. But when you fall (and you will fall) and you look up and he’s nowhere to be seen, look for Jesus who was also running with you and never left your side. Let Him speak your WHY back to you as He brushes you off, and start again. And again. And again.
If you do that, someday your WHY will become your NOW.
And that’s a very good day.
